Getting Real
The second (and hopefully last) surgery is over and we're back at our home away from home, aka the Home2Suites, watching the US Tennis Open and reflecting over our day. Today's surgery required a little more patience and an extra measure of calm because of a few technical challenges but we persevered and God helped us every step of the way.
My wired-in surgical obturator is out and my "interim" obturator is in place. I learned how to take it out and put it in by myself with my eyes closed. I'm not ready to look inside my mouth yet (I think there's a psych term for this called maladjustment disorder) but I really think I just need some time to come to terms with everything that's transpired. I have a technical diagnosis now of a "head defect." Gee whiz, I don't know which word is harder to take: "transpired" or "defect." I guess I'd rather have transpired than expired and defect rather than defective. It may be a matter of perspective: how you and I see things.
The NG tube is still in place. We're unclear as to why right now. It may have something to do with the upcoming radiation treatments. Anyhoo, I've kinda gotten used to my "jewelry accessory" and can live with it if need be. It is a good ice breaker!
Day before yesterday, I was waiting in the hotel lobby for an elevator to arrive. Ding! The elevator doors opened and I was greeted by a 14-year-old-ish, tall, athletic, basketball-garbed young male statue. Instead of leaving the elevator, he stood gobsmacked, frozen like a deer in headlights. That was a first. Never had anyone so kindly clued me in to my state of "defect." My old high school teacher demeanor quickly kicked into gear and with compassion and half a smile (because the other half of my face didn't move) I say: "Oh, it's ok. You should see the other guy!" With his own half-smile, he snaps out of his shock and returns my high-five fist-bump as he exits the elevator.
You gotta love this kid. God loves all of His kids. Sometimes life greets us with gobsmacking paralysis but God, in His mercy, always let's us know He has us. Right there. Right then. He is with us. It's no big deal. He is the Victor.
Isaiah 26:3 reminds me over and over again to stay fixed on Him. He can handle everything, everywhere, every time. It also reminds me that God is always victorious over "the other guy." Whether he is called Depression or Sickness or Sin or Woundedness. God is victorious over all.
This afternoon, we are resting on the sofa, practicing swallowing and speaking while we praise with hands lifted high and hearts bowed at the throne of our Glorious King. Join us. Thank Him. He is here. All is well.
-Susan(of the Wildflowers)